Monday, October 08, 2007

The Aftermath

It's been over a month since I've had a chance to update my blog. So much has happened in these past few weeks that I have not had enough time to process and to reflect. Have you ever had those times in your life when you feel like you have just been 'Martha' --- so busy doing, doing and doing and you know you need to be 'Mary' but the endless to do list and certain situations require that you can't really stand still cause you have deadlines to meet. This is how my life has felt over the past month since I got back from Cambodia. Planning and organizing a conference with others involves a lot of coordination but I look back at this last month in true amazement at how God sustained me and protected me from health or any other interruptions. To say that I had 'supernatural energy' is an understatement considering that I was averaging 5 hours of sleep a night for the last 5 weeks. God is good, God is faithful, God is my rock where would I be without His strength and His loving arms holding me up when I had nothing left to give or to offer and yet each day He was there, filling me up, giving me what I needed. This past weekend was no different. I had to share with Shannon, one of the younger sisters who travelledwith me to Cambodia this past August at 3 services at church. Even though we didn't have a long time to share, I was concerned at the beginning of the week as I was feeling so exhausted and dry after all the conference stuff and needed the Lord to give me some revelation, some inspiration as I so desperately wanted people to see His heart and to hear His heart. Once again, He showed up and even though I spoke for only 8 minutes, I praise God for the Holy Spirit for touching me and giving me the words that would speak of God's redeeming love in the lives of my spiritual daughters in Cambodia. If you are interested in hearing what was said check out the Rexdale Alliance site: under sermons. You'll have to search through the MP3 for the last 12 minutes of the service though.

In the next few days I hope to give some updates on the conference. This past week I found myself physically at work in my 'day job' but not mentally there. Now I feel like Elijah after the battle of Mount Carmel and I just want to hide under one of those trees. The adrenalin has gone and the old body is saying rest. So this is what I am planning to do. Rest over the next 3 months---taking a bit of a sabbatical from ministry but any of us know a true sabbatical from ministry doesn't just happen, it has to be intentional with the right balance so we'll see. There is lots to think and pray about but I love these times of cultivating a sabbath heart and attitude as God has so often spoken to me through them so I look forward to just sitting still, resting and waiting on Him.

In another few minutes it will be Thanksgiving. There is much that I am thankful for but the most important thank you I can say is to my Lord and Savior Jesus for who He is in my life nd and for His heart for those who are brokenhearted. I thank Him for the calling He has given me to speak up for these who have no voice and to be an advocate for their plight. I thank Him for HIs love in my life and for the grace He has extended to me so many times when I did not deserve it. I thank Him for all 173 people who attended the conference and for what He did that day to stir hearts and to break hearts and to cause people to weep for these little ones that He weeps over. I thank Him that He is calling me to share in the fellowship of His sufferings as I enter into the sufferings of these little girls who have been sexually exploited. I thank Him for His redeeming love and for the story of Hosea that He is bekoning me to read that I may understand how to minister to them and to love them unconditionally. Thank you Lord for your extravagant love that you continuously lavish on us.

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